Twas the Night Before Implentation

Twas the night before implementation, and all through the house,
Not a program was working, not even the mouse
The programmers hung by their tubes in despair,
With hopes that a miracle soon would be there.
The users were snuggled all deep in their beds,
While visions of enhancement danced in their heads.
When out of the elevator arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter.
And what to my wandering eyes should appear
But a super programmer (with a six pack of beer).
His resume glowed with experience so rare,
He turned out great code with a bit pusher's flair.
More rapid than engines, his programs they came,
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name:
"On Update! On Add! On Inquiry! On Delete!
On Batch Job! On Closing! On Functions Complete!"
His eyes were glazed over, fingers nimble and lean,
From weekends and nights spent in front of a screen.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head
Soon gave me to know that I had nothing to dread.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
Turning specs into code, then turned with a jerk,
And laying his finger upon the "enter" key,
The system came up and worked perfectly.
The updates updated, the deletes they deleted,
The inquiries inquired and the closings completed.
He tested each program and tested each call,
With nary an UAE, all had gone well.
The system was finished, and the tests were concluded,
The users last changes were even included.
And the user exclaimed with a snarl and a taunt,
"It's just what I asked for, BUT IT"S NOT WHAT I WANT!"


Original Artist: Unknown